One sure sign of a nervous speaker is frozen hands
“TJ, I don’t know what to do with my hands!” cries my trainee in front of the video camera.
The answer, of course, is that you should do with your hands what you normally do with them when you speak—move them fluidly and constantly. Unfortunately, when people become nervous, they forget to do things that they normally do without even thinking.
The problem with failing to move your hands is that you now appear to be a nervous potted plant. Plus, your voice is more likely to become monotone.
Some of my trainees try and try during practice sessions, yet they claim they still can’t move their hands while speaking. In these extreme cases, I ask them to do the following exercise while being videotaped. Loudly state your ABCs, or simply spout gibberish for two minutes. The point is that I want sound coming out of your mouth but I don’t want you to think about what you are saying. Instead, I want you to focus exclusively on moving your hands, on gesturing in a forceful manner. You are priming the pump. Next, watch the video of yourself. Then watch it again with the sound off. Make mental notes on what it took to get your hands moving. Then do the same when you are giving a “real” speech. It may feel phony or even look contrived the first few seconds, but once you get going, you can return to your normal way of gesturing without having to think about it.
Then and only then will you appear to be natural and comfortable when speaking in front of people.
