Many executives and politicians spend so much time trying to figure out what reporters want in the form of answers to questions that the news makers lose sight of the primary goal: your message should be a reflection of good things you want to communicate about yourself and your organization. Of course you have to take into consideration what is of interest to the media and to your audiences, but don’t forget the most important constituency in the messaging process: yourself.
Whether you are facing a crisis in the media or the local society reporter wanting to write a puff piece on you, you should always be on the offensive, advancing positive things about yourself. Once you get in a reactive mode, you are stuck in a defensive mode. In this capacity you are forever trying to avoid getting hurt or to minimize pain.
Why be so pessimistic? No matter how cynical the reporter is or how negative the story may be, you always have a chance at getting some of your positive message points out. But not if you don’t even try.
Remember, if you know the media want to hear a certain message from you and your audience wants to hear a certain message from you, don’t give it to them unless it is also a message that you absolutely want communicated. If your message doesn’t appeal to all three constituencies, it is a failed message point, so scratch it.
You can wear the perfect suit, have great posture, and put on a winning smile, but you’ll still make a lousy impression to your speaking and media audiences if you use wimpy words and phrases. The following are words that get speakers into trouble:
“It seems to me…” (obviously it seems that way to you, you are the one talking!)
“I believe…” (again, we can see it is you)
“I think…” (see above)
“A bit” (exactly how much is that?)
“Like” (unless you really do like someone)
“You know?” (no, I don’t know)
“You know what I mean?” (if you have to ask, then you weren’t too articulate, were you?)
“You see?” (see what?)
“More or less” (so which is it?)
“Really” (You Really need a new intensifier if this is all you can come up with!)
“Hopefully” (better to say “I want this to happen.”)
“Pretty” (unless you are talking about someone who is good looking)
“Perhaps” (or perhaps not)
“Sort of” (sort of what?)
“Kind of” (this isn’t to kind)
“Maybe” (or maybe not)
“Fairly” (it’s not fair)
“Reasonably” (you don’t have reason)
“Quite” (speak loud)
“So” (so what)
“Rather” (I’d rather you not use this)
“Somewhat” (somewhat of what?)
“To some extent” (what to what extent?)
“To a certain extent” (same as above)
Do you have colleagues, friends or family who use more than their share of wimpy words and phrases? Then leave this column on their desk. (Hopefully, maybe, they will kind of, sort of, take the hint.)
I often stress to clients that the only way to get dramatically better as a speaker or media presenter is to critique a video of your speech or media interview, preferably right after it happened. Everyone thinks this is a good idea, and yet I estimate that fewer than 1% of my clients or the general population of people who speak actually do this.
“Why?” I ask.
“It takes time,” I am told.
Well, ya, but so what? It’s worth it if you want to improve and stay in top form.
Paul McGuinness has been manager of the band U2 since 1978. He told the New York Times (June 12, 2005) that one of their secrets to success is the following:
“You’ll never see the band emerge from the dressing room until at least half an hour after each show, and it’s not because they’re taking showers. We’ve developed a practice over the years where every night the five of us sit down and deconstruct the show.”
Wow, think about that. Here is a band made up of wildly successful, incredibly rich superstars who have millions of fans telling them they are wonderful in every way. Yet how do they spend 30 minutes after every show? Criticizing and critiquing every aspect of their performance.
That’s how you get good. That’s how you stay good.
If it works for musical performance it also works for speaking performances.
And it’s not like these rock stars had nothing better to do with their time. They are, after all, Rock Stars. In their early single years, doing a critique after the show meant turning away all of the groupies. Now that lead singer Bono is a major political figure in his own right, the time they take to critique their own performance presumably means Bono doesn’t get to return the US Treasury Secretary’s calls as quickly.
So don’t tell me you don’t have time to critique your won speeches; I’m not buying that argument anymore.
One sure way to be quoted by the press is to give specific, tangible examples that demonstrate your message point. Reporters are capable of describing phenomenon at the mile-high, abstract level. But if you can give a down-to-earth, real-life example, you increase your chances of being quoted in the story.
Reporters can talk about the firearms industry, but they will quote you talking about your Smith and Wesson revolver.
Journalists can write about the market’s sense on how interest rates will go up, but they will also quote you saying, “I’m 100% convinced Greenspan will increase rates by .25%.”
Abstraction is the enemy to every good journalist. When you can give a clear-cut example to a reporter, it can be an important element in making the story come alive and more understandable to the reader, viewer or listener. That’s why you will be quoted giving examples.
People fled the burning building at 12.15 AM.
TJ Walker, Media Training Worldwide
The above sentence needs no quotes around d it.
“I awoke to the smell of burning plastic. I threw on my bathroom and ran down the fire escape.”
This is a much more vivid example and would be used as a quote.
Many novices at the media game make the mistake of trying to sound “smart” by speaking in an elevated, sophisticated, abstract manner. This approach is counterproductive and will result in you getting zero quotes or sound bites in a story.
To get ahead with the media, always give great example.
How do you guarantee that you get off on the right foot with an audience? By being introduced exactly the way you want to be. Don’t leave this to chance. If you don’t give your introducer the EXACT introduction you want, chances are, they will mention you as the president of a business you are no longer associated with or as the husband or wife to a spouse you are no longer married to.
Don’t leave your introduction up to chance! You don’t want to have to waste your first few minutes correcting your introducer.
Write out your introduction exactly the way you think it would be most interesting to the particular audience you are speaking to. However, here is the unique twist: Don’t write out the introduction word for word. Instead, write out the first few sentences word for word. But then, list your accomplishments and credentials in bullet point format. This will allow your introducer to speak in a more conversational manner. Because, as you know, nothing is more difficult than reading a script word for word with out sounding like a zombie. This way you make your introducer look better; and you look better in the process because it seems as though you haven’t shackled your introducer. Then end with a couple of sentences that you do want the introducer to read word for word. That way you have set yourself up for maximum approval as you begin.
There aren’t many big problems in life that can be solved by doing nothing, but fortunately, that is the solution for many speaker woes.
Do you find yourself saying too many uhs, ums, ers and you knows when you are giving a presentation? The solution is to do nothing, i.e., pause. By pausing throughout your presentation, you will correct many of your problems.
I remember when I was in first grade and it was time for an art class. What I didn’t like was that my teacher required me and the rest of the class to color every square inch of our piece of paper. We couldn’t just draw a cloud in the sky; we had to color the whole sky blue and all the grass green. Everything had to be covered.
Many adult speakers take the same attitude with their presentations. They feel as though every second they are standing they must cover up the air with some sound.
The result?
The speaker puts out a steady stream of ums, likes, you knows and other verbal parasites. All the words come out a jumbled mush. The speaker comes across inarticulate, unsure, and lacking in confidence.
Over the years, I have found out the hard way that it is not productive to ask people to focus on NOT saying uh or um. All this does is make the speakers even less confident and more jittery.
Instead, I get the speaker to focus on pausing more often. Pause after a thought, Pause when you are uncertain. Pause when you feel like saying uh or um. By specifically trying to pause more, the mind learns that it is OK not to be uttering sounds every second. Once you develop the habit of pausing when you give a presentation (we all automatically pause all of the time during normal conversation), you will enhance your image as a polished speaker.
…..so pause away.
That’s right, I stripped for my audience and they loved me for it—or at least they seemed to like me a little more. You may think that the demand for middle aged white men with middling physiques to strip in front of business audiences is quite weak. And you would be right.
But here’s the catch. I stopped stripping once I got to the same level as my audience. I was speaking to a group of Fortune 500 executives who were all well dressed, but were not wearing ties. I was in my standard suit-and-tie business getup.
So here’s the problem: while I don’t mind appearing a little dressier than my audience, I don’t like to appear a lot more dressed up than my audience. If they are thinking I’m a stuffed shirt, they are less likely to be focused on my message—and that’s a problem for everyone.
So what did I do? At the exact moment that I put up a new PowerPoint slide and everyone was looking at the screen on one side of the room, I quickly (and I mean very quickly) took off my tie and unbuttoned my top button on my shirt. When everyone turned back to watch me speak a few seconds later, I was all of a sudden more like they were. We had less of a barrier between us and now we had more in common.
Every speaker should strive to attain repertoire with audiences. It takes more than dressing the same as audience members, but that can be a good first step.
Other times I might take a jacket off right before or even during a speech. Now, I never do this in a showy way, but always in a moment when no one is looking.
That way I can strive to have more in common with my audience.
Why is that desirable? Because the more your audience can relate to you, the more they will listen to you without filters or screens.
So if you want to maximize your impression in front of any audience, be prepared to dress up or down at a moment’s notice.
Of all of the elements of the PR magician’s black bag of tricks, none is more mysterious than the crafting of the sound bite or quote. (A sound bite is the quote you get on TV or radio newscasts, a quote in a text publication is when you see actual quotation marks around words, followed by your name. I use the term sound bite and quote interchangeably)
The world is divided into two groups. Those who instinctively know how to turn any abstract message point into a sound bite and those who don’t. For those who know, it is as easy as breathing or laughing. These people often find themselves in marketing and communications fields. They have liberal arts degrees and they are creative.
For those who don’t know how to make something quotable, it as mysterious as trying to speak in tongues. These people have engineering and business degrees.
They are logical, rational, linear thinkers. They view themselves as systems thinkers.
Fortunately, I have created a system that will allow these logical, rational, linear thinkers to turn any message point into a sound bite that is irresistible to even the most hard-bitten journalist. The system is called A BEACH PRO, which is an acronym that stands for analogy, bold action words, emotions, examples, absolutes, attacks, clichés, humor, pop culture references, rhetorical questions, and opposition quotes.
Nearly every quote you read in newspapers and trade publications contains one or more of these above eleven elements. Nearly every sound bite you see on TV or radio has one or more of these eleven elements. Once you understand that reporters require these structural elements in their stories, it becomes incredibly easy to get the exact quotes you want in a story.
It is important to realize that reporters need quotes for their stories. Quotes are one of the essential building blocks of a good story. Quotes are needed to make the story more interesting, more understandable, and more memorable—reporters need you!
You should never go into an interview without knowing in advance the exact and precise quotes you want to see in tomorrow’s news paper or tonight’s newscast.
Note: this is not the same as knowing your general message points; sound bites are much more specific than that.
If you ever go into an interview without knowing what quotes you want to see, you have already failed miserably. If you are providing PR consultation to an executive who is about to be interviewed, and you haven’t supplied the client with specific sound bites, you are guilty of malpractice.
If you are within 100 yards of a TV camera, assume that it is on and pointing at you. It sounds like obvious advice, but many supposedly media savvy people forget this.
•During the first presidential debate of 2004, President Bush winced, pouted and puckered, every time Senator Kerry disagreed with him. The agreed upon rules said no reaction shots would be used of a candidate who was not speaking. But the rules were broken and Bush suffered by looking peevish.
•In 1992, while Bill Clinton was speaking, President George H. W. Bush was caught glancing at his watch, as if he couldn’t wait for the whole d#@n thing to be done. This was not a positive image builder.
•In 1960, Vice President Nixon was repeatedly shown to be frowning and scowling while Senator Kennedy was speaking. TV viewers thought Nixon lost, in part, for the dour look.
But it’s not just presidential big shots who make these blunders. Every day on CNN, CNBC, and Bloomberg TV I see CEOs and other top business leaders get introduced with great fanfare by the anchors of these networks. But then, a funny thing happens. While the network anchor or host is introducing the guest, the on-camera shot switches to the guest WHILE THE ANCHOR/HOST IS STILL TALKING. The guest/business executive erroneously assumes he/she is not on the air yet.
Therefore, the person is sitting there with a blank look. This, of course, looks ridiculous. A blank look on ‘TV makes everyone appear to be bored, boring, listless, dull and unattractive.
If you are in a TV studio or near a camera, assume that it is on. Then, you should act in such a way that you don’t mind your image being shown to viewers, especially when you aren’t talking. If you want to appear consistently as someone who is confident, relaxed, optimistic and pleasant, then you must not be seen frowning, scrunching up your face, scowling, or picking up your nose. For the best results, you should consistently smile, look pleasant, and listen attentively to whoever is speaking.
Don’t assume the camera is off until you have left the TV studio building.
From education to brain function to inspiring messages to techno-possibilities, this list represents quite a breadth of topics.
- Sir Ken Robinson says schools kill creativity (2006): 13,409,417 views
- Jill Bolte Taylor‘s stroke of insight (2008): 10,409,851
- Pranav Mistry on the thrilling potential of SixthSense (2009): 9,223,263
- David Gallo‘s underwater astonishments (2007): 7,879,541
- Pattie Maes and Pranav Mistry demo SixthSense (2009): 7,467,580
- Tony Robbins asks Why we do what we do (2006): 6,879,488
- Simon Sinek on how great leaders inspire action (2010): 6,050,294
- Steve Jobs on how to live before you die (2005): 5,444,022
- Hans Rosling shows the best stats you’ve ever seen (2006): 4,966,643
- Brene Brown talks about the power of vulnerability (2010): 4,763,038
- Daniel Pink on the surprising science of motivation (2009): 4,706,241
- Arthur Benjamin does mathemagic (2005): 4,658,425
- Elizabeth Gilbert on nurturing your genius (2009): 4,538,037
- Dan Gilbert asks: Why are we happy? (2004): 4,269,082
- Stephen Hawking asks big questions about the universe (2008): 4,153,105
- Jeff Han demos his breakthrough multi-touchscreen (2006): 3,891,251
- Johnny Lee shows Wii Remote hacks for educators (2008): 3,869,417
- Keith Barry does brain magic (2004): 3,847,893
- Mary Roach 10 things you didn’t know about orgasm (2009): 3,810,630
- Vijay Kumar demos robots that fly like birds (2012): 3,535,340
Why do all public speaking trainers stress the need to tell stories in public presentations? Is it just because we were all C- students with liberal arts degrees who couldn’t get into Business School and we cower at the sight of any number higher than 10? (OK, that may be part of it)
The real reason we stress stories is that all of our in-the-field research shows that most people don’t buy into facts if they are inconsistent with the stories they believe. We all like to believe that we are rational human beings and that only other people are irrational, but the fact is we all have a tendency to believe facts that fit into our worldview.
It is easy to make fun of people who follow a cult leader who predicts the world is going to end on a certain date. But when that date passes and the world still exists, these followers only redouble their faith in their leader’s wisdom.
But this happens to a lesser extent every day in the business world. If your employees have the following story in their head “Our company doesn’t care about its employees, it only cares about short-term profits,” then no amount of 401K tinkering or Friday afternoons off in the summer will change that fundamental story in their heads.
On the other hand, if your customers believe that your company has a passion and commitment for the highest health and quality standards, even the occasional rat-found-in-the-soup won’t hurt your long-term image. Facts do matter. But facts are forgotten quickly, whereas stories linger in the memory.
Furthermore, facts that don’t jive with an audience member’s story about who you are and what you are all about are almost instantly discarded and forgotten. This is why any executive who truly wants to communicate a new set of ideas or numbers must develop a narrative story to put the facts together in a way that makes sense. Your stories must create reality but also be consistent with your audience members’ preconceived notions of reality.
Otherwise, your facts will fall flat.
If you are about to give an opening night performance in a one-man show on Broadway to three thousand people who have each paid $120 per ticket, it’s understandable that you have a few butterflies in your stomach. Expectations are high. Very High! Your audience expects you to be brilliant, flawless, entertaining and funny. Anything less than perfection will be cursed as a disaster and a rip-off.
Fortunately, most of us face lower expectations when we give presentations to people. The skilled speaker uses these lowered expectations to his or her advantage. Not because he or she uses this as an excuse to prepare poorly, but just to develop a proper mindset for every speaking occasion.
Last night I made my debut on Broadway. I was the male lead—the groom, in the international sensation “Cookin’.” Was I supremely confident and totally comfortable when I first entered the stage and uttered my first line?
Actually I was comfortable and confident.
Is this because I have total confidence in my acting abilities and a sense that long and hard rehearsals had paid off?
No, not at all. I hadn’t rehearsed and I have never been in any play, not even in high school.
In truth, I was plucked randomly out of the audience and brought up to the stage.
I had no lines to utter except for “tastes good!” after drinking the wedding soup.
So I don’t deserve any roses or even pats on the backs. Still, for many people, the idea of going up on stage in front of hundreds of strangers in the middle of a theatrical performance is a terrifying idea.
Why wasn’t I terrified? I’m certainly no braver than anyone else. In fact, I have an extremely low threshold for pain.
The real reason I wasn’t terrified is that I was able to gauge accurately the expectations the audience had for me. In this case, all I had to do was stand there, play a dorky guy, wear a silly hat, do as I was told, and let professional actors make fun of me. I realized that my being on stage wasn’t about me; it was just an opportunity for the actors to display their talents. This, I correctly deduced, would be a part well suited for my talents. It made sense for me to relax, so I did.
Too often, in the business world, we forget that our role is to make other people look good. We forget that it isn’t the end of the world if we look silly for a few moments. In fact, you can gain credibility with some people if you show you don’t mind looking silly occasionally.
Why was I picked out of hundreds to be on stage? Was it because I looked like the next Hamlet? Sadly, no. I was selected simply because I gave the actors direct eye contact when they came down my row and then I smiled and looked like I was having a good time, which I was. Everyone else was staring down at the floor thinking to themselves “please, God, don’t let them pick me.”
Of course, it doesn’t really matter if you ever go up on stage to participate in some silly theatrical show. But what does matter is that you can confidently “take the stage” at a moment’s notice, anytime you do have an opportunity to add a message or just a spark to any meeting or gathering you are attending.
So get ready to break a leg!
Just as a great Jazz artist who performs nightly can go into a riff for extended sets, so too can great speakers “riff” for lengthy periods of time.
Warning! This is not for the faint-hearted.
In general, I advocate that all speakers have a well-thought out beginning, middle, and end, complete with a handful of major points and well-developed stories to go with each point. But there are times when you can go without.
Note: this is not the same as “winging it.”
I always speak from notes (albeit in a way that no one sees my notes) and I have a set structure for my presentations or training sessions. But one day I was hosting an event for the National Speakers Association New York Chapter and I was asked to be the substitute speaker WITH ONLY FIVE MINUTES ADVANCE NOTICE.
Normally, that would be no problem. I could simply go into my hour presentation on how to communicate with the media. Unfortunately, that wouldn’t work, because I had just given that presentation to the group only a couple of months earlier.
But I also have an hour-long presentation I do on how to give an effective presentation. But this was inappropriate because my audience was made up of professional speakers.
So what did I talk about? I spent the next hour talking about business tips and strategies I had learned over the last few years from fellow members of the speaker association. I literally didn’t have time to write an outline or structure a plan. I simply got up and talked.
The results? Feedback was as positive as any I have received for any presentation in my career.
Is this because I am a natural born, silver-tongued speaker? Not at all. Thought I never stuttered, I was an extremely shy child of few words.
My speech went well because I give speeches at least three times a week and I now have good speaking habits that have been acquired through constant repetition.
Here are the things that I did during my riff that will also work for you if you ever have to speak with absolutely no time to prepare.
1. I was comfortable and confident. Why did I start the speech in this condition? Because I speak so often in that state, I wasn’t able to get into any other physical or emotional state.
2. I used a speech grammar. Even though I was thinking of new material that I was going to say as I said it, I still used my “old” manner of speaking. That is, I would make one point, give an example and then tell a story about it using conversations with real people to make the point more memorable.
3. I interacted with my audience constantly. If I forgot what to say next, or I just wanted to see if I was making sense, I would ask questions of specific audience members. I encourage all of my trainees to plan to do this anytime they are speaking in front of relatively small audiences. But the truth is it doesn’t require a lot of planning, as long as you do it.
4. I moved in a normal manner. I constantly walked around the room, stopped, started, got closer to some audience members, and then the others. This created great variety for the audience and created the aura of great confidence.
5. I didn’t think on my feet. That’s right, I didn’t think of entirely new ideas to share with my audience. In stead, I simply recalled what I considered to be interesting conversations I had already had in the past with various members of this association and then I recounted the ones that I thought would be useful, interesting and relevant to the whole group. (Remember—thinking creatively in the spotlight is hard, remembering interesting conversations from the past is easy)
6. I actively encouraged questions throughout the presentation. Granted, you can’t do this if you are speaking to more than 500 people, but in a small group this is an excellent way to keep people engaged and involved. Plus, the questions helped me pad out my material to an hour (since I had no planned material at the start).
7. I was fearless during question time. Is this because I am omnipotent? Hardly. It’s just that I subscribe to the theory that all questions are easy: either I know the answer in which case I give it, or I don’t know they answer and I tell my audience “I don’t know” and then give my best guess on where they can find the answer. Novice speakers and even very good ones become noticeably nervous and embarrassed when asked questions they don’t know the answer to. You can’t control what you don’t know, but you can control how you feel about what you don’t know.
8. I acted like I was having a good time and I never apologized. In truth, I could have done a better job if I had had a day or two to prepare my speech, but I didn’t waste my audience’s time by reminding them of that fact. I did not articulate in any manner that I was annoyed or felt put upon by not having received advance notice. (in truth, I was happy because I am always looking for opportunities to speak and hone my craft) I tried to follow a rule that I give all of my clients which is: never talk about your speech, never apologize, never call attention to any inadequacy—simply give great interesting content.
9. I beat the audience’s expectations. The president of the organization mentioned before and after my speech that I was doing this with literally no notice, so the audience had low expectations. But note, I relied on someone else to set the low expectations; I didn’t try to do it myself.
10. I spoke with passion. I purposely haven’t bored you with any of the details of my speech because unless you are a professional speaker, they wouldn’t interest you. But I specifically only made points and told stories that I really cared about deeply and that I thought were critically important to my audience.
Of course I made some mistakes in this speech that I wouldn’t ordinarily make (I didn’t have a strong finish—and I added more stuff after I had already sat down—both medium-sized blunders). However, my passion for my subject helped overwhelm the mistakes I made. Passion for your subject will always make you more interesting and likeable to your audience because most speakers seem bored and are consequently boring to their audiences.
So there you have the secrets on how to give a great spontaneous speech. Please note that I am not advocating that you go out of your way to fail to prepare for speeches. But if you are called upon with literally no notice, there isn’t any reason why you can’t do a great job. Every one of the skills I used above are just that, skills. They aren’t rare genetic talents; they are simply habits that can be acquired by anyone who chooses to do so.
Nothing is better than when you can make a live audience break up with laughter while you are giving a speech. Of course, nothing is worse than attempting humor, everyone knows it, and you fail.
Many beginning and intermediate speakers feel like they have to have some humor in their speech, especially at the beginning, or their speech will be a failure.
Not so. You can be a great speaker, and never, ever get laughs.
If you are going to attempt humor, there are several guidelines you should follow.
- Don’t tell jokes. “Joke” telling is a tough skill to master. Something most
standup comics work on nightly for years before they master proper technique. If you tell a joke, don’t act like you know it is a joke—and make sure you have a personal connection to it.
- Never telegraph a joke or humorous anecdote. Don’t say, “I’d like to tell you
a humorous story about…” Simply tell the story. Your audience will decide whether or not it’s humorous. If you announce you are trying to tell something funny, you eliminate the element of surprise, which is crucial to much humor. Plus, you immediately increase your audience’s expectations. When you pronounce that a story is going to be funny, a certain percentage of your audience is going to think, “Well, I’ll be the judge of whether or not it’s funny.”
- Don’t start your speech with a funny story of joke. Many in your audience will
expect you to tell a joke at the beginning. It’s OK to plan to use a humorous story, but place it in the middle or near the end.
- Don’t tell well-known humorous stories or anecdotes. Everyone has heard the
one about the boat that thought the lighthouse was another boat. Don’t tell it again. All of your humor needs to seem to be a natural part of who you are and what you do. Otherwise, you will seem like a second-rate comic who just got kicked out of the Catskills.
- Don’t tell humor that isn’t specific to some point you are trying to make. If
you are telling a funny story just to be funny, the stakes become much higher. At a subconscious level, your audience is now comparing you to other professional comics like Jerry Seinfeld. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to compete with Jerry Seinfeld. That is not a battle you or I will win.
The best way to use humor in a speech is to simply tell a real life story where something funny happened to you. You know it is funny because when you relayed the incident to fiends and family, they laughed hard. Now, when you tell it in front of a large audience, you are likely to get a laugh. And if you don’t, it won’t seem like you flopped, because you were simply telling a story to make your point. You won’t seem like you were trying too hard, therefore it wasn’t a flop.
Go break a leg!
There is one thing I find in common with many of my media and presentation training clients: they like to talk about how they are going to give a speech or talk about what they are going to say in a media interview, instead of actually rehearsing the real thing.
THIS IS A COMPLETE WASTE OF TIME.
The best way to prepare for a media interview or a speech is to actually rehearse it in an environment as close to the real thing as possible. My experience is that people can talk a good game about what they are going to say in a media interview, but when you stick a microphone in their face and ask them a question, something completely different comes out. Far better to spend some time—even if it’s only five minute—rehearsing a media interview and recording it. Then, when you play it back, the executive can see what was said. Bluster counts for nothing at this stage—the camera doesn’t like.
Similar is the situation with speaking. Executives are often great at talking about the interesting points they want to cover in a speech and insightful anecdotes they want to bring up. But then they get nervous in the actual speech and start reading bullet points of facts off of a wall.
It’s easy and relaxing to talk about what you are going to do at a later time.
It’s relatively hard to actual do it now. That’s why baseball players play real innings in practice; they don’t just run wind sprints.
There is a reason that Broadway actors don’t just talk about their characters and what they are going to say on opening night of the show. Actors do lots of full dress rehearsals. If you are giving a speech or media interview, you don’t have to memorize the way an actor does, but you do need to rehearse. It is the only way to get an accurate gage of your strengths, weaknesses, and what needs to be fine tuned before the real performance.
Rehearse, don’t just rehash.
Many business executives have a huge disconnect in their communication styles.
When they are speaking one-on-one with colleagues and friends, these executives are lively, interesting, conversational, and persuasive. But put these same dynamic executives in front of 12 business colleagues for a so-called “formal presentation” and these presenting executives turn into mind-numbingly boring zombies who can do nothing more than read bullet points off of a PowerPoint screen in sleep-inducing manner.
They know they can do better. They know they should do better. And yet, they just can’t seem to shake the idea that a presentation absolutely, positively has to involve standing up and reading fact after fact as quickly as possible. They know they aren’t communicating. They know they don’t listen to anyone who does the same to them. Still, old habits do, in fact, die hard.
How do you break this defeatist mindset?
I get my clients to focus exclusively on two words: Re-live events. If you can simply re-tell an event you experienced that is relevant to the message you are communicating, you can communicate to a business audience. Re-live the event by re-telling what your colleagues said to you at the moment, what you were feeling, where you were, what your problem was and what the solution was. If you can simply focus on accomplishing this, you can transform yourself from being dishwater dull to a toastmaster extraordinaire overnight.
So if you don’t want to obsess over new slides or the perfect hand gestures or humorous stories, that’s OK. Simply focus on re-telling events you have experienced that are relevant to your audience and you will do fine.
One sure sign of a nervous speaker is frozen hands
“TJ, I don’t know what to do with my hands!” cries my trainee in front of the video camera.
The answer, of course, is that you should do with your hands what you normally do with them when you speak—move them fluidly and constantly. Unfortunately, when people become nervous, they forget to do things that they normally do without even thinking.
The problem with failing to move your hands is that you now appear to be a nervous potted plant. Plus, your voice is more likely to become monotone.
Some of my trainees try and try during practice sessions, yet they claim they still can’t move their hands while speaking. In these extreme cases, I ask them to do the following exercise while being videotaped. Loudly state your ABCs, or simply spout gibberish for two minutes. The point is that I want sound coming out of your mouth but I don’t want you to think about what you are saying. Instead, I want you to focus exclusively on moving your hands, on gesturing in a forceful manner. You are priming the pump. Next, watch the video of yourself. Then watch it again with the sound off. Make mental notes on what it took to get your hands moving. Then do the same when you are giving a “real” speech. It may feel phony or even look contrived the first few seconds, but once you get going, you can return to your normal way of gesturing without having to think about it.
Then and only then will you appear to be natural and comfortable when speaking in front of people.
Your voice is your most precious speaking instrument. You must preserve and protect it at every opportunity.
Here are several steps to follow to conserve the strength and quality of your voice before a major speech or presentation:
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Don’t sing in the car while listening to the radio. This strains your voice.
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Don’t talk on the telephone.
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Don’t talk at all, except when necessary.
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Don’t smoke.
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Don’t allow yourself to be around second-hand smoke (stay out of smoky bars in
your hotel).
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Don’t ever scream!
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If you are swimming, be careful not to exhale through your mouth (this will
strain your vocal chords. Instead, exhale through your nose.
The voice box can be a fragile instrument. If you are nice to it, your voice will serve you well. If you abuse your voice, it will abandon you when you need it most.
When you get up to speak before a live audience, or if you are already standing and moving toward the front of the room to speak, all eyes are on you—and your posture. Your audience is instantly forming opinions about you, your confidence, your enthusiasm, and how interesting you will be. And a great deal of this is based on how you are standing.
Many of us are nervous or shy when we have just been introduced. So without realizing it, we shrink ourselves by looking down, curling our shoulders down, and compressing our bodies. At a subconscious level, we are thinking “if I make myself small enough, nobody will notice if I screw up.”
This is the exact opposite of what you want to do.
Instead, you want to stand as tall as possible, without appearing to be stiff. It may be helpful to think of it as though you were trying to get the top of your head to touch an imaginary ceiling that is three inches above you. (I’m not suggesting you get on your tip toes or that you grimace trying to contort your body upward) Think of yourself as actually growing another couple of inches, as you are walking up to speak (this will help your confidence too).
By holding yourself high, it is nearly impossible for your chest to cave inward in the manner that self-conscious people often do. If you are holding yourself as high as possible, your stomach muscles will be working to lengthen your body and you will benefit from a mild slimming effect. Also, if you are holding yourself as high and as tall as possible, it is also impossible to appear to be slouching, leaning or slumping in any sloppy fashion.
However, one word of caution, if you try to hold yourself high and you stop moving your neck, head, body or arms in a natural way, you will create an entirely counterproductive effect: you will seem like the Wizard of Oz’s “Tin Man” only dorkier.
So before and during your presentation, hold yourself high, but remain fluid and natural.
Nothing is more intellectually shallow than the Power of Positive Thinking, right? What could be more annoying than local TV anchors doing “happy talk”
during the middle of a newscast?
If you pride yourself in being a “straight shooter” or one who “tells it like it is” you are in for a real surprise when dealing with the media. Of course the news media will appreciate you if you trash your boss, your competitors, or especially yourself, but nobody else will. In fact, going negative is a sure-fire way to talk yourself out of friends, an employer and even a career.
If you are in the middle of an interview, regardless of the questions being asked, you must try to answer them in positive terms. I’m not advocating telling lies or even sugar coating, but how about dipping reality in a small vat of honey before distributing it to the world via the media?
The problem with answers that attempt to be “balanced” in the sense that they convey negative, neutral and positive statements is that only, and I mean ONLY the negative statements are likely to make it into the final story. For example, if you say, “It’s true, my family connections did help me get my first job 25 years ago, but ever since then, I’ve had to work twice as hard to prove that I am not just the son of a celebrity. In fact, I know that blah, blah, blah (more stuff about how hard you worked)”
The only quote that might end up in the story is this:
Walker conceded what his critics have always contended, “It’s true, my family connections did help me get my…job.”
End of quote.
Remember, a media interview is not a true conversation where you are rewarded for balance and objectivity. The “balance” in the story will come from the reporter getting quotes and perspectives from a variety of sources, some of whom may have negative views on you and what you do. So if you want to ensure balance about yourself, you must strive to be overwhelmingly positive in all of your comments to the news media.
Another great way of getting your message quoted is for you to quote someone or something that is opposing your or providing a contrast to your viewpoint.
“My opponent, our current governor, said ‘Elect me and I’ll create 1,000,000 new jobs.’ But what he didn’t tell us at the time is that he would create those jobs in China!”
That is an opposition quote. You are putting words into the mouth of someone else and then answering them. This sound bite element is often coupled with attacks, for obvious reasons.
At least once a month, I see some major celebrity who is going though an expensive divorce quoted this way:
“As Shakespeare once said, ‘the first thing we should do is kill all the lawyers.’”
It’s not original (and lawyers can make the case that the quote is taken out of context), but the quote is irresistible to most reporters.
Opposition quotes can often be complex and usually rely on some explicit or implicit attack; therefore they aren’t appropriate for most corporate executives.
But opposition quotes remain a favorite of reporters, so use them only if and when they are appropriate to your message.